If All Else Fails Read online

  If All Else Fails

  Book One of the Five Pillar Series

  Theresa Mae

  If All Else Fails

  Copyright © 2015 by Theresa Mae.

  All rights reserved.

  First Print Edition: February 2016

  Limitless Publishing, LLC

  Kailua, HI 96734

  www.limitlesspublishing.com

  Formatting: Limitless Publishing

  ISBN-13: 978-1-68058-492-9

  ISBN-10: 1-68058-492-8

  No part of this book may be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any printed or electronic form without permission. Please do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of the author’s rights. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to locales, events, business establishments, or actual persons—living or dead—is entirely coincidental.

  Dedication

  The Five Pillar series is dedicated to my children. May you one day live in a world free of prejudice and oppression, and may you be the leaders of that change…

  Table of Contents

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Chapter One

  “And certainly did We create man from an extract of clay. Then We placed him as a sperm-drop in a firm lodging. Then We made the sperm-drop into a clinging clot, and We made the clot into a lump [of flesh], and We made [from] the lump, bones, and We covered the bones with flesh; then We developed him into another creation. So blessed is Allah, the best of creators.” [23:12-14]

  Moving the summer before senior year sucked.

  Starting senior year in a new high school sucked even more.

  Not that I wasn’t used to moving. Mom and I had been semi-nomads since I could remember. It wasn’t that we had a gypsy spirit or were chasing a pipe dream. No. Mom was just trying to raise a kid all on her own and went wherever her various jobs took us.

  The difference this time, with this job, was that we had been here in Ohio for about nine months, and for the first time in forever, there was no foreseeable plan to move—ever again.

  I twisted my silver ring in circles around my finger, watching the clock.

  Ten more minutes.

  The minute hand on the clock mounted to the far wall of the classroom sprang forward.

  Make that nine. Nine more minutes until the school day was over, and Shawn and I would spend all weekend watching scary movies and hanging out at my house while Mom was out of town.

  That’s right.

  Out. Of. Town.

  I bit my lip, watching the second hand moved slow and steady.

  “Be sure to choose the religion you want to study by Monday,” Mrs. Grasen announced as she stacked a pile of papers on her desk. “You’ll partner up with someone from the class and have four weeks to work on it until finals.”

  If I weren’t so good at multitasking, Mrs. Grasen would probably sound like the teacher in the Charlie Brown cartoons right about now, but I got it. Pick a religion for our final project and be ready to pair up by Monday.

  No problem.

  Well…maybe a little problem.

  Especially with Shawn around all weekend and the house to ourselves. It would be hard to concentrate, but I had to. There was no time to mess up in senior year. I had my GPA to maintain if I wanted to get into a decent college, and getting into a decent college was the only thing that stood between me and a successful career in medicine.

  Five. Five more minutes—

  My phone buzzed in my pocket. I jumped, then glanced around to be sure no one had noticed. Not that anyone would. I was the new girl with no real friends. I’d gotten used to being on my own, it made the process of picking up and moving a whole lot easier when there was no one to say goodbye to.

  I stole a glance at my teacher as I slipped it out and read the text from Shawn.

  Shawn: What do u want to do today?

  I couldn’t help but smile. I texted him back.

  Ruby: Maybe watch a few movies at my house? Mom is gone. You can stay as long as you want.

  The phone buzzed with a reply.

  Shawn: Sounds promising.

  My throat tightened. It was true, I’d been dating Shawn for about six months. He was really sweet and really cute, but call me old fashioned, there were still some things I held sacred. I was determined not to make the same mistake my mom did and get pregnant at eighteen, get kicked out of my house by my super religious parents, and be forced to work two, sometimes three jobs just to survive.

  Not my idea of a happily ever after.

  Especially when Prince Charming jumped ship, leaving my mom to hold the bag—or bundle, I guess, in her case.

  I tapped my fingers over the touchscreen.

  Ruby: Not promising anything.

  Butterflies beat against my ribs as I waited for him to respond. Maybe if I wasn’t willing to move forward, he’d stop liking me. Wouldn’t be the first time I was dumped for saying no.

  Yet another reason I never had a real boyfriend.

  My phone buzzed with his reply.

  Shawn: U know I’m joking. See U tonight.

  I exhaled. Maybe I finally found a keeper.

  The school bell tore through the speakers. Everyone pushed out of their seats and snatched their backpacks off the floor.

  I did the same, and draped my sling purse over my shoulder before sliding on my two-ton backpack. I swear I’d have to use a walker by the time I was twenty from hauling books around all day. College wouldn’t be any better.

  Students rushed through the classroom and filled the halls in a mass exodus. I stood near the back of the crowd and pushed onto my tiptoes, catching a glimpse of Shawn—just the top of his shaggy brown hair and red letterman sweater.

  “Hey, Ruby.” Someone tapped me on the shoulder. “You dropped this.”

  I turned to see Layla, a Muslim girl who sat two rows over in my World Religion class. She held out my notebook. A silver spoon ring wrapped around her index finger and colorful bangles hung on her wrist.

  “Oh. Thanks.” I took the notebook and smiled. The shiny salmon colored material of her head scarf matched her shimmery eye shadow. “I like your…” I gestured to her head. “Scarf thing.”

  She smiled, her big hazel eyes like some kind of anime character. Nothing like my own dark blue eyes. I still had no idea how I got them, or my straight, red hair. Mom had neither. Maybe a trait from my dad, though I never asked. “Thanks. My dad brought it back for me from Jordan this past summer.”

  I moved with the line toward the front door. “That’s cool. Have you ever been there?” I shoved the notebook in my purse and groped in my bag for my keys.

  “Yeah. Plenty of times. My family used to go every summer until last year. Once my sister got married and had a baby, my mom didn’t want to leave for the entire summer
anymore, and my dad said it was too expensive to fly everyone over there just for a few weeks.”

  “Ah. Makes sense.” I nodded in a valiant effort to be polite and pay attention as the row in front of me finally pushed into the hall. I gave Layla a haphazard wave. “Sorry. I have to run. Have a good weekend!” I pushed through the crowd, weaving between groups of people who stood around, clogging up traffic near the back doors leading to the student parking lot.

  I wove between parked cars to my own dingy, blue Accord, unable to ignore the pounding in my chest. Resting my hands on the hood, I drew in a few deep breaths. “Chill out, Ruby,” I said to myself. “We’re just hanging out. No different than any other day.”

  “Really? That’s too bad.” I gasped and spun to see Shawn standing behind me with one thumb hooked around his backpack strap, the other hand shoved in the front pocket of his swim team sweater.

  The way his eyes smiled when he did made my legs as limp as noodles.

  “I was hoping for something better than ‘every other day,’ but it’s cool.”

  I shifted my weight, hoping my cheeks didn’t look as flushed as they felt. “I uh…” I cleared my throat and swept red strands of hair over my shoulder, shimmering like a new copper penny under the afternoon sun. “So you caught me talking to myself.” I shrugged. “No big deal.”

  “Just as long as you’re not answering yourself, I think we’re good.” He winked and pulled keys out of his pocket, twirling them around his finger.

  Now my legs felt like limp spaghetti.

  Must. Break. Awkward. Silence.

  I examined his backpack. “Got any homework over the weekend?” I blew a puff of air from my cheeks, annoyed from my super lame attempt at exciting conversation.

  “An English paper and some math, but that’s about it. You?”

  “Yep. World Religion project.”

  “Cool. We can do homework together.”

  The fact we now had something to focus on besides each other somehow put my nerves at ease. “Okay.” I yanked open the driver side door and sat. “See you at my house?”

  “Yep. Right behind you.”

  He climbed in his red Mustang and closed the door behind him.

  I finally exhaled as his car pulled out of the school parking lot. “No big deal,” I said to myself, realizing he’d be hanging out at my house for the whole weekend. “Just don’t freak out like an idiot, and everything will be fine.”

  I shifted my car into drive and turned onto the main road. It took about ten minutes to get to the apartment complex we called home. Mom said we’d try to move into a house in a year or two, but until then, the two-bedroom townhouse was more than enough.

  I slowed to a stop in my designated parking spot in front of our weathered garage door. As I stepped onto the black asphalt, I saw the plants in front of our entrance were even more wilted than when I left this morning. I’d have to water them before my mom came home from her business trip, but not now.

  Now I had about ten minutes to get inside, clean up any mess I left behind from breakfast, and change into something cuter than the faded jeans and graphic t-shirt I wore to school.

  I grabbed my backpack and used my key to jiggle open the lock. When I stepped into the small, tiled entryway, I closed the door behind me and dropped my backpack by the coat rack, then dashed upstairs to my room.

  It felt strange for the house to be so quiet. Usually Mom would shout something indiscernible from the first-floor office, where she spent a few hours every day sending e-mails to clients. Being an event coordinator for one of the largest companies in the US sounded like it would be a blast, but Mom was always stressed. Stressed or not, we were thankful for the reliable income.

  I picked through my closet until I found an outfit I was content with—a yellow button down shirt with bell sleeves and a pair of dark blue skinny jeans.

  I had just run a brush through my hair when the doorbell rang. I stepped to the bay window and pushed aside the white curtain to see Shawn’s car parked out front.

  “Okay.” I swallowed, my stomach in knots. I wanted to believe Shawn was different from all the other guys. That he wouldn’t try to push me into doing anything I wasn’t ready for. I wanted to believe it so bad. So bad that I was willing to take the chance and test the waters.

  I walked downstairs and swung open the front door with a smile. Shawn arched a brow and checked me out from head to toe. He stepped inside and closed the door behind him. “Were you wearing that at school?”

  “No.” I ran my clammy palms over my jeans. “I changed.”

  “You look nice.” He grinned. “So what are we going to do first?”

  A lump formed in my throat. “Um…homework?”

  “I know.” He tightened his grip around the strap of his backpack. “I meant, what subject?”

  “Oh. Right.” I grabbed my backpack and waved him into the kitchen. He sat across from me at the round dinette table.

  We organized two distinct piles of schoolwork, which included textbooks, pencils, and notepads with sheets of paper half torn out, the edges folded up from constant abuse. He slipped a piece of paper out from between the pages of his binder with a big CM on the top.

  “Chemistry, huh?” I crinkled my nose. “I hate anything that has to do with math.”

  “It’s not so bad. My teacher’s kind of boring, but the science part is pretty cool.”

  I nodded, an awkward silence making the air seem thick. Shawn examined the history book in front of me. “What are you working on?”

  “It’s a final project for World Religion class, worth like seventy percent of my grade. I have to get it right or I’ll fail the class.”

  “What religion are you studying?”

  “I haven’t chosen one yet.”

  He nodded. “I guess anything will be up your alley since you’re Atheist.”

  “I am not Atheist. I’m Agnostic.” I shook my pencil at him. “There’s a difference.”

  “I thought they were the same thing.”

  “Nope.” I opened my binder and sifted through some papers. “Atheists believe there is no God. Nothing to chase after. No elusive knowledge or rules to mold society to a man’s preferences. The belief that we are all perfectly capable of living by good old morals and values. God has nothing to do with it.”

  “And that’s not you.” It came out more of a statement than a question.

  “Nope. I’m Agnostic, which is the belief that humans can’t know a God exists because we lack the ability to obtain proof of his existence. Give me proof and I’ll believe—though I have yet to come across any hard evidence God exists.”

  Shawn shrugged. “I guess that’s the beauty of religion. Everyone has the right to believe what they want, even if it’s nothing at all.”

  “True. But…” I skimmed through the page numbers, finally finding the unit on religions of the world. “What you said is right. Anything I study will be okay, because that’s the point, right? We’re supposed to study something we don’t know much about.”

  He snickered. “Leave it up to you to get all serious about a school assignment.”

  I read the list of world religions, considering each one individually.

  Amish? I wouldn’t be able to interview anyone with that belief, so I’d have to skip it.

  Buddhism might be interesting. I marked it as a maybe.

  I knew some about Catholicism since my grandparents on my mom’s side were Catholic.

  Hinduism? I found it pretty complicated from the little I knew. Probably too much to take on and still get a good grade.

  Shawn slammed his book closed. I jumped as he leaned forward, forearms rested on the table and fingers woven together. “I’m bored.”

  I narrowed my eyes, a smile playing over my lips. “Homework first, movies later.”

  “Your complex has a pool, right?”

  I narrowed my eyes further. “Yeah.” I stretched out the word, knowing exactly what he was getting to.

/>   “So why don’t we go swimming? It’s like ninety degrees out.”

  “After. Homework.”

  His shoulders slumped forward. “Okay. So the faster we get this done, the faster I get to see you in a bathing suit?” He slowly peeled open his book, never breaking eye contact.

  My cheeks flushed with heat. I gestured to his paper with my pencil. “Maybe.”

  “I can deal with a maybe.” His brows slowly rose. “Oh.” He reached in the front pocket of his backpack and pulled out a movie. “I rented it from the Redbox in front of Walgreens.” He held up The Notebook. “It’s supposed to be an epic chick flick. Thought you might like it.”

  I tried not to crinkle my lips. “That’s really sweet. Thanks.”

  “No problem.” He slid it toward me across the table. “But after homework, right?”

  I examined his soft gaze. “How about after swimming?”

  He smiled. “Even better.”

  Chapter Two

  The weekend passed faster than I expected. Shawn and I must have watched a half dozen movies on Netflix, eaten entirely too much stuffed-crust pizza, and swam in my apartment complex pool—twice. It was fun, like hanging out with a friend, but one who gave me butterflies every time he smiled.

  The sun had begun to set, and there was school the next morning. Not to mention my mom was due to come home in a few hours, and she’d flip if she found a guy in the house.

  I sat on the couch beside him, hugging a pillow to my chest with my legs draped over his lap. His hand rested on my knee, the last scene of our zombie movie coming to a close.

  Shawn stretched his arms over his head with a yawn. “Well.” He dropped his arms and rubbed the back of his neck. “What did you think of the movie?”

  “Honestly…I’m wondering where I can apply for the two hours of my life back.”